Monday, July 2, 2012

How to make your man feel....Crazy about you???

My sister shared this article on Facebook today,  60 Ways to Love Your Man Better and Make Him Feel Crazy About You.  I read it and quite frankly can only say .... Bull shit.....

Let me explain, here is the list posted on the article:  Skip to Rules number 61 and 62.  They are really all you need to know.

  1. Laugh. Laugh at his jokes as loud as you can, even if you’ve heard the jokes 20 million times.

    No... That's creepy.  
  2. Text him, better still sext him.

    I don't own a cell phone.  So No
  3. Tell him that he is your hero and you wouldn’t be happier with any other man in the world.

    This is gay
  4. Start a hobby together. Hobbies can be a unique bonding experience and will let you learn more about each other.

    This is even more gay.
  5. Cook his favourite dish. You know what they say: “The way to the man’s heart lies through…”

    Yeah, sorta kinda but wont make me crazy.
  6. Sign up for pole-dancing classes and show him couple of tricks next time you go to the night club with the pole available.

    See rule #61 below
  7. Listen. Listen to what he has to say. Sometimes it is so easy to drift off while he is talking, make the effort to listen. It is worth it.

    HAHAHAHAHA, 
  8. Surprise him in the bedroom. Striptease dance — and maybe introduce whipped cream or chocolate.

    See rule #62 below
  9. Learn the new technique of kissing him (anywhere) and next time you are in the bedroom show it off.

    See rule #61 below
  10. Send him off to the quest. Give him a big problem to solve and then admire the results. Men are born doers.

    NOT, 
  11. Let him spend time with his male friends. This time is very important for him. Respect it.

    Gay
  12. Get him a pet he has been dreaming of.

    super gay
  13. Let go of his annoying habits. Just ignore or completely forgive him for these habits.

    Duh, we have no bad habits
  14. Give positive reinforcement. Instead of criticizing him, find what he is doing right and praise like crazy.

    What are we toddlers?
  15. Play Monopoly (or any other board game) together.

    Not even sure how to respond..... NO
  16. Go for a walk together. To the ocean, forest or park. Enjoy holding hands and being outside.

    Another gay thing
  17. Never throw away his stuff, even if it looks way too old (and I mean ancient). Always ask him first.

    See rule #61 below
  18. Play a game of strip poker. He will really appreciate it.

    See rule #61 below and save some time
  19. Look after his health. Cook healthy foods, make sure he eats healthy lunches.

    See rule #62 below
  20. Organise a naughty night with cigars and alcohol. Make love like crazy. You can dress up for the occasion too.

    Again see rule #62 below
  21. Go on a detox together. This gives you both the opportunity of sharing torturing but insanely useful experience and gives you amazing support.

    Slap me silly and call me a bitch.
  22. When he comes back home from work, run out, jump on him Hollywood “I was waiting for your for ages” style and give him a long kiss.

    Again see rule #61
  23. Send him an e-card with an inside joke — or just to say “I love you”.

    No
  24. Sign up for a gym — or for any other sport activity together.

    Questionable,  I think rule #62 applies here.
  25. If you want something, just tell him. Do not hint. Hints are a waste of time.

    Again Rule #62
  26. Watch his favourite movie together. And if he laughs, at least smile even if it isn’t funny for you. If you find it amusing, even better.

    LOL, Rule #61
  27. Give him some space to be alone and enjoy his favourite book or hobby by himself.

    Never, see rule #62
  28. Pack a surprise love-you note in his lunch box.

    See Rule #61
  29. Organise a romantic night. Candles, romantic dinner, massage. Even if the night ends up with you falling asleep after all that food. He will appreciate the effort.

    See Rule #61
  30. Clean his car for him. And add some nice touches, for example a post-it note with your lip prints.

    See Rule #61
  31. Give him a face massage, manicure or pedicure. Insist — even if he seems apprehensive; as you know how to look after yourself in that regard and he is less likely to know.

    See Rule #62
  32. Wear a matching outfit. Why do we save matching outfits only for weddings? People will definitely notice and compliment you on “being a great fit to each other”.

    This is about as gay as it gets
  33. Read something new in the area of his interest and discuss it with him.

    As long as it involved rule #62
  34. Learn new things and talk to him about it.

    See Rule #61
  35. Make sure that you have enough of energy for yourself, so you can share. Remember, we can give only the things we have.

    See Rule #61
  36. Inspire and empower him by reminding him about his past successes.

    See Rule #61
  37. Joke with him.

    See Rule #62
  38. Plan your next vacation together.

    See Rule #62
  39. Have a raunchy photo session for two. He is the photographer, you are the model. Use your camera (especially if you are still at the girlfriend/boyfriend stage).

    See Rule #61
  40. Start working on reviving your passion. Try unexpected places, scenarios, role-plays.

    See Rule #61
  41. Send your children to their grandparents and have a romantic weekend together.

    See Rule #61 and #62
  42. Compliment him often and tell him he is (still) very manly. Being a man in 21st century is not easy.

    See Rule #61
  43. Kiss him and hug him for no reason.

    See Rule #61
  44. Make herbal tea and enjoy it together on the balcony/garden/backyard.

    See Rule #62
  45. Look at him when he is talking. Give him undivided attention.

    See Rule #61
  46. Do not floss your teeth in front of him.

    See Rule #61
  47. Brag to your mother about something he has achieved recently, preferably while he is within earshot.

    NO
  48. Wear his favourite dress/the dress he bought for you tonight.

    No  See Rule #61
  49. Buy something nice and useful for his hobby (you might need to do some research here).

    See Rule #62
  50. Make a nice “crafty” present. Involve your children or do it yourself.

    See Rule #61
  51. Get some nice lingerie. It will be a present for both of you.

    No,  See Rule #61
  52. Make it a habit to kiss him every time you leave a room or the house.

    See Rule #61
  53. Get him a good pen. Every time he writes something, he will think of you.

    See Rule #62
  54. Have a photo session together and frame the best picture so he can take it to his office.

    See Rule #61
  55. Ask for help — men love to feel needed.

    Gay
  56. Order balloons to be delivered to his office (for his birthday, your anniversary or just for no reason).

    See Rule #61
  57. Cuddle up to him while watching a movie and tell him that you are not scared if he hugs you.

    See Rule #62
  58. Ask him for advice. We all love to give advice even if people do not ask for it, so give him this opportunity to express his opinion.

    See Rule #61
  59. Defend him like a tigress if your family or friends try to criticize him.

    NO
  60. Nothing says “I love you” like a power tool. Let him choose and then buy one.

    See Rule #62
  61. Show up Naked.
  62. With Beer.
  Number 61 and Number 62 are the only rules you need to follow to "make your man crazy about you.

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